I'm eating all of the evidence.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
