Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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