real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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