She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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