dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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