As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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