do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
