Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You should frame my arrest warrant.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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