Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
