I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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