Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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