there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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