uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
What drink are we having for lunch?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
