Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
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Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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