I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
