Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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