How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
