Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.

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  (734): 11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle. http://tfl.nu/pkgd
  Replies (4) Good night (1446) Bad night (2290)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.

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  (203): Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle. http://tfl.nu/zfv7
  Replies (7) Good night (2546) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  Walk of Shame. In a state park.

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  (712): Walk of Shame. In a state park. http://tfl.nu/aczj
  Replies (8) Good night (3008) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts

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  (404): don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts http://tfl.nu/dnse
  Replies (13) Good night (4217) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?

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  (417): And my fence, why is part of it on the roof? http://tfl.nu/v3wp
  Replies (6) Good night (5165) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.

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  (937): She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life. http://tfl.nu/md1r
  Replies (10) Good night (1636) Bad night (5215)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days

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  (260): Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days http://tfl.nu/vj5z
  Replies (2) Good night (1845) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.

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  (305): I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/47xz
  Replies (8) Good night (1541) Bad night (2042)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.

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  (740): This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod. http://tfl.nu/pyaj
  Replies (9) Good night (1852) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."

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  (606): I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening." http://tfl.nu/f5c0
  Replies (3) Good night (1498) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave

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  (973): Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave http://tfl.nu/h612
  Replies (16) Good night (1607) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.

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  (513): He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet. http://tfl.nu/9hfz
  Replies (3) Good night (596) Bad night (748)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.

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  (914): I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have. http://tfl.nu/s46w
  Replies (5) Good night (764) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.

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  (251): Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile. http://tfl.nu/y0n1
  Replies (4) Good night (972) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time

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  (410): I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time http://tfl.nu/zqpv
  Replies (0) Good night (256) Bad night (515)

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