What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
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