I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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