i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
i out mim tonsoeep
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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