I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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