if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize