Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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