Whod you bang
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize
