You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
