all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
wow bdsm is so cute
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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