i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
