Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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