I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
