the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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