Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We left the knife in your bed.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Dick very happy bro
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
