You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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