I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
