It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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