well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
