My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
