she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
