Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
