All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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