I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
