You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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