im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
honey bunches of taint.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Did I show you my penis last night?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Your shirt... Was in my pants
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
