ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Randomize
