My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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