That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I wish i was in the wii world.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
