Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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