that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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