I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
