Yo dont text me then not text me
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
