Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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