I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
