So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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